This Saturday is The Standish Standoff at my FLGS. A 32 player 1,850 40K hobby-centric tournament. In the weeks leading up to it I’ve been painting furiously and getting in some play testing. Suffice to say the painting has gone a lot better than the gaming. I’ll preface this by saying this article is mostly me pissing and moaning and I blame nobody for not wanting to read it.
Long story short, I have been getting my ass handed to me for a good long while now. Take last night against Tyranids; by the game’s end I had one model left on the table. In the past few weeks I’ve been tabled more times than I had previously in a year. I could claim it’s what I’m playing, and to an extent there’s some truth to that, but I can’t help but wonder. To explain, I’m playing a very limited Chaos force because leading up to this tournament I knew I had to work with what I had and what I could get painted. It’s not my ideal list even based on what I own but I knew I could get it ready and yesterday I finished off the last bits. So, I made the right call in that regard. That being said, there’s only so much you can blame on your list.
To give some insight into just how poorly I’m doing. Since 6th edition hit my record with Chaos is 7 wins and 17 losses. That’s not all preparation for this Saturday either, so it goes to further the fact it’s not this particular list that’s doing me in. I’d be lying if I said getting my ass routinely kicked for the past four months hasn’t affected me. I have never been the best player at my FLGS but I’ve always held my own and at least won more than I’ve lost. The transition into 6th has been my undoing. It’s easy for me to see that I’m not 100% comfortable with it yet and while I’m still feeling around in the dark, everyone else has latched onto it and grown beyond me.
Last week I wasn’t able to make it to my FLGS’ weekly 40K night, I had plans, but at the same time it was relieving. I didn’t have to bend over and let someone shove their foot up my ass for a week. I’ve had rough patches in the past but never once before had I found not being able to play 40K as a relief. Going last night had me wondering who would be handing me another ass-kicking instead of being focused on practicing with my list for Saturday. This is also why I’ve put up so few articles lately. I still love the game but it doesn’t love me right now and that makes it hard to find the motivation to put time into articles.
A bit ago I started a series here calledand I really need to mentally invest more into it than I have. I haven’t even been taking my advice to myself seriously because I’ve been so disheartened with the game lately. I really do need to step back and basically start over because playing 40K as I am now is obviously not working. I want to look forward to playing every week again. I want to enjoy this new Chaos codex. I don’t need to have an amazing record for that either, or even a better record period. I just need to feel confident again.
To that end I’m building up my Chaos force. I held off on building up my Chaos army previously because at the time there was a new codex coming and I wanted to make informed purchases. Before that it was waiting on 6th edition and the impact that would have. Now 6th is here, the new codex it out and there’s nothing holding back my army expansion. It’s time to go from playing what I have to playing what I want. It may not improve my record but at the very least it will be playing lists I enjoy and built from the ground up instead of lists working with what I have.
At the moment, though I’m looking forward to The Standoff this Saturday, I’m also looking forward to it being over; as much as I hate to say that. The Standoff will be the last tournament where I field what I have to and after will be a new beginning for me…I hope.